I spent quite a bit of time in hospitals earlier this year. Not very happy memories, those, but necessary. And in their own way, they helped me gain the forward momentum I needed to fight my way out of my dark fog and confront my mental health issues, as well as fulfill the promises I've made to myself and others. My creative fire is back, I have renewed enthusiasm for the future, and I've gone over seven months without drinking. And the EMTs were nice enough, so there's that. I think it's safe to say that life got exponentially better as the year went on. And as 2011 winds down, I found myself yet again visiting a hospital a couple of times this past weekend, but for an entirely different (and joyous) reason. More on that as I'm given the go ahead to post about it.
So far, I've still only got the two completed songs, by which I mean lyrics only. I'll figure out the music soon enough, and then the other half-finished/sort-of-started songs. And then I can use Garage Band to make them a reality and post them on my Facebook page. I seem to have all kinds of folks willing to help me find places to play, and the set list has been growing as well. The few times I've performed have been well received, which serves to reassure me that my decision to go it alone was a good one. I'm not going for rock star status, just well thought of entertainer status. Don't get me wrong, if someone wants to offer me some kind of deal, I'd be more than happy to consider it. But being a middle aged man, I'm fairly well certain that that ship has sailed.
Christmas this year was pretty fantastic. The people around me, the mood, the fact that I'm actively working on the future, and the terrific news that my daughter became a Doctor Who fan/made Dean's List in her first semester all contributed to Holidays that were indeed happy (and as God is my witness, I'm still not sure which of those two things makes me prouder). I think everyone did a pretty good job with presents for each other and such, and I was truly blown away by what I received, but honestly, I'd still have been happy if I hadn't gotten anything. It was just that kind of Christmas this year.
I still get a little overwhelmed by things and freeze up every now and again, but I have people in my life who are willing to help guide me through those times, as well as a roster of professionals to help me better recognize when those times are coming, so that I can arm myself against them. Jess has been a huge part of that. I still have days when the fog threatens to take over, and sometimes my brain and my mouth have different agendas, but her support, patience, and love have been immeasurably helpful and healing. Doesn't hurt that we occasionally share a frontal lobe.
So I'm closing the door on 2011. For all of its' pitfalls and frustrations and heartache, I feel like I'm happier and more comfortable with myself than I ever have been. I have a lot of people to thank for that. If you're reading this, chances are you're one of them. So thank you, and I'll see you after the ball drops.
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
Sunday, December 25, 2011
A Little Christmas Father/Son Time Hi Tech
My daughter bought me this for Christmas. I am SO itching to drive the cat nuts with it...
Thursday, December 22, 2011
My My My...
Turns out my last entry is now the second most popular post on this blog ever. Like the current reigning champ, I've gotten a lot of feedback about it, both online and privately. Many folks agreed with my basic point, which has nothing to do with what people should be allowed to say, but instead not freaking out when someone says something intended to wish you well. Some disagreed with me and were very thoughtful and respectful. And some completely ignored my central premise and decided to snark it up and be nasty. To the first group, I say thank you for your support. To the second, thanks for the opportunity to exchange ideas, and I wish you a very Merry Christmas. To the last...well, you can just blow it out your ass. I'm not going to bother arguing with someone who'd rather lambaste me for what they want me to have said, than discuss what I actually wrote. If you're that bothered by nothing more than what I have to say, you are welcome to stop reading. Keep looking for sinister motives in everything people do and say. I'm sure you'll find them.
Monday, December 12, 2011
Not...Sure...If...Serious...
So Saturday went well, or so it seemed. I did four songs, with Jess handling the guitar part for two, and my friend (and former Gobshite mandolin player) Nason playing on the other two. I made a last minute decision that I just wasn't confident in my own playing to subject a room full of friends and strangers to it. I'll get there. I've already gotten interest from a couple different clubs and booking agents, so I'm working on adding more to the set, and also toiling feverishly to improve my mandolin playing to virtuoso level. Or at least convincing myself that, really, my playing is fine, and I should just shut up and do it.
On to today's notion. And my apologies up front, but this one may, in fact, be considered a rant by some...
I'll be the first to admit that I can sometimes get sidetracked by a minor detail or offense, when I should be focusing on the big picture. I recognize it a lot more these days, but it can still happen. That's why I'm glad to have people in my life who are willing to snap me out of whatever nonsensical obsession I'm engaged in at the time. And just as important, I'm more willing these days to listen to reason and see the forest again.
I don't know why apparently no one at Fox News has that type of person in their lives. Someone to stop them and tell them "Hey, it's really not that big a deal," or "You know, it's going to be okay, we'll get through this." Or maybe even "HAPPY HOLIDAYS AND MERRY CHRISTMAS MEAN ESSENTIALLY THE SAME GODDAMN THING, JACKASS!!!"
Holy hell, can we maybe dial it down a bit with the "War on Christmas" nonsense? Nobody, NOBODY, is trying to kill Christianity by saying "Happy Holidays." This is a completely manufactured scandal, designed by people who never pass up an opportunity to be offended by something. I can't imagine what childhood trauma would make presumably educated adults rage over how to properly wish someone glad tidings. Who has that kind of energy?
For the record, if you happen to come across my path, you can say either phrase, as well as "Happy Hanukkah," "Joyous Saturnalia," or even "Merry Kwanzaa" to me, and I promise I will not bite your head off for it. My most likely reaction will be "Thanks, you too!" I just have too many other things to worry about besides a two word phrase meant to be good wishes from someone. And for that matter, the people at Fox probably do as well. I'm guessing this is just their way of not dealing with those other things.
So, to sum up: Regarding "Merry Christmas," "Happy Holidays," or any other iteration thereof, it really is no big deal. Calm down, have some nogg, eat a sugar cookie, and say "Thank you" to someone who's attempting to be friendly. If your biggest problem in life is whatever it is the kid at the CVS register says to you as he bags your shampoo and can of Pringle's, maybe it's time to reevaluate exactly why this time of year is important to you.
Oh, and my Amazon wish list has been updated. Just throwing that out there...
On to today's notion. And my apologies up front, but this one may, in fact, be considered a rant by some...
I'll be the first to admit that I can sometimes get sidetracked by a minor detail or offense, when I should be focusing on the big picture. I recognize it a lot more these days, but it can still happen. That's why I'm glad to have people in my life who are willing to snap me out of whatever nonsensical obsession I'm engaged in at the time. And just as important, I'm more willing these days to listen to reason and see the forest again.
I don't know why apparently no one at Fox News has that type of person in their lives. Someone to stop them and tell them "Hey, it's really not that big a deal," or "You know, it's going to be okay, we'll get through this." Or maybe even "HAPPY HOLIDAYS AND MERRY CHRISTMAS MEAN ESSENTIALLY THE SAME GODDAMN THING, JACKASS!!!"
Holy hell, can we maybe dial it down a bit with the "War on Christmas" nonsense? Nobody, NOBODY, is trying to kill Christianity by saying "Happy Holidays." This is a completely manufactured scandal, designed by people who never pass up an opportunity to be offended by something. I can't imagine what childhood trauma would make presumably educated adults rage over how to properly wish someone glad tidings. Who has that kind of energy?
For the record, if you happen to come across my path, you can say either phrase, as well as "Happy Hanukkah," "Joyous Saturnalia," or even "Merry Kwanzaa" to me, and I promise I will not bite your head off for it. My most likely reaction will be "Thanks, you too!" I just have too many other things to worry about besides a two word phrase meant to be good wishes from someone. And for that matter, the people at Fox probably do as well. I'm guessing this is just their way of not dealing with those other things.
So, to sum up: Regarding "Merry Christmas," "Happy Holidays," or any other iteration thereof, it really is no big deal. Calm down, have some nogg, eat a sugar cookie, and say "Thank you" to someone who's attempting to be friendly. If your biggest problem in life is whatever it is the kid at the CVS register says to you as he bags your shampoo and can of Pringle's, maybe it's time to reevaluate exactly why this time of year is important to you.
Oh, and my Amazon wish list has been updated. Just throwing that out there...
Wednesday, December 07, 2011
Well...Um...Hmmmm...
This is one of those times when I definitely want to post something, if for no other reason than to stay productive and keep exercising those muscles, but I can't narrow my topic down. The vast majority of what I've written about in this space this year has been personal. But there's really nothing much to update. I moved, check. Brought the cat with me, check. Doing my own thing musically, check. Need a bigger paycheck, check. It's pretty much the same as it's been lately. One or two things have disappointed me recently, but you know, that's what karma's for. I haven't written much about any current events. I think there are plenty of places where people much smarter than I am can give insight into the state of things today.
Remember a couple years ago, when those survey things were all the rage on Myspace and Facebook and in the blogs? I did a bunch of those, even though I was most definitely not the target audience for them. But at least they were a kind of writing exercise. My answers tended towards the snarky and sarcastic, which was due mostly to the fact that I was still trying to write for my standup act, and I wanted to practice writing good, short jokes. I'd do another one, but the way text slang changes day by day, I don't know that I'd even be answering the question I think I'm answering. I only just found out that FTW also means "For The Win."
I guess everything I do, though, unless it's specifically for publication, could be considered a writing exercise. So maybe I really shouldn't be too concerned with my topic or whether it's weighty enough. That's just my bastard of an internal editor (Let's call him "Smedley"), trying to stifle me. I think my problem is that some of my posts this year have really resonated with some folks, and so now I'm trying to live up to that every time, like a bar that I've set for myself. Well even the best hitters in baseball only succeed about four out of ten times, so what am I doing pressuring myself like that?
Eh, whatever. It's more or less natural for self-doubt to creep in, even when doing our best to strangle it, right? Even as upbeat as I've been about my creative pursuits lately, I still feel sometimes like I'm going to make a fool of myself the next time I'm on stage or something. Luckily, I'm no longer taking in any fool-juice, so hopefully that improves my odds somewhat...
Speaking of the next time, I am again going to plug my appearance at Leitrim's in Worcester this Saturday. I'm not sure exactly what time I'm going on, I'm guessing somewhere around 10ish. Still toying with my set list, but I would say it'll be equal parts traditional Irish and punk covers. And maybe a special guest or two will hop up and join me for a couple of songs. I've also been invited to pick a Thursday night to go down to Beatnik's Bar in Worcester and do some pickin' and grinnin'. More on that as it develops.
Insert pithy closing line here...
Remember a couple years ago, when those survey things were all the rage on Myspace and Facebook and in the blogs? I did a bunch of those, even though I was most definitely not the target audience for them. But at least they were a kind of writing exercise. My answers tended towards the snarky and sarcastic, which was due mostly to the fact that I was still trying to write for my standup act, and I wanted to practice writing good, short jokes. I'd do another one, but the way text slang changes day by day, I don't know that I'd even be answering the question I think I'm answering. I only just found out that FTW also means "For The Win."
I guess everything I do, though, unless it's specifically for publication, could be considered a writing exercise. So maybe I really shouldn't be too concerned with my topic or whether it's weighty enough. That's just my bastard of an internal editor (Let's call him "Smedley"), trying to stifle me. I think my problem is that some of my posts this year have really resonated with some folks, and so now I'm trying to live up to that every time, like a bar that I've set for myself. Well even the best hitters in baseball only succeed about four out of ten times, so what am I doing pressuring myself like that?
Eh, whatever. It's more or less natural for self-doubt to creep in, even when doing our best to strangle it, right? Even as upbeat as I've been about my creative pursuits lately, I still feel sometimes like I'm going to make a fool of myself the next time I'm on stage or something. Luckily, I'm no longer taking in any fool-juice, so hopefully that improves my odds somewhat...
Speaking of the next time, I am again going to plug my appearance at Leitrim's in Worcester this Saturday. I'm not sure exactly what time I'm going on, I'm guessing somewhere around 10ish. Still toying with my set list, but I would say it'll be equal parts traditional Irish and punk covers. And maybe a special guest or two will hop up and join me for a couple of songs. I've also been invited to pick a Thursday night to go down to Beatnik's Bar in Worcester and do some pickin' and grinnin'. More on that as it develops.
Insert pithy closing line here...
Thursday, December 01, 2011
Geekery and Getting Used to It
First off, Movember is now over. I want to thank those who made their generous contributions to my page this past month. I'm not sure if you can still donate, but as far as I can tell, the link still works. If you can, please do. And I guess enough folks like the 'stache I grew for me to decide to keep it, for at least a little bit. I think it looks okay. I may re-introduce the chin component for an actual Van Dyke, but I want to mull it over a little before I decide.
And so a new chapter begins. I find myself much calmer right now, as I turned in the keys on Sunday and got the last of my things out of the apartment. I'm a bit melancholy to leave the area, but it's not like it's a three day drive if we want to head back down to visit some time. And who knows, we may end up settling there eventually. There are still one or two matters to deal with to finalize everything, and that might get a little dicey. But for the most part, it's done. With three days to spare.
I know it's not that huge a move, but it does feel a little odd to be a resident of Central Massachusetts, after spending my entire life in the Boston area and suburbs. I don't think I've ever been so landlocked. For someone who likes being near the ocean so much, to be heading in the opposite direction does strike me as funny. Maybe it's only funny to me, but there it is. I don't know why that is, though. I'm still relatively equidistant from Boston and Providence, although a little further away from both than I was before. I still work in the Boston area. I really can't put my finger on it, but there's definitely the feeling that I've crossed some kind of threshold. I'm not saying that as if it's a bad thing. It just feels...different.
I did get a surprise this weekend, however. Jess and I went to a local author's day at the Worcester version of Annie's Book Stop (I don't know if it's only in Massachusetts or not, but if you don't know, it's a chain of franchised-owned used book stores.). One of the local authors just happens to be our roommate, and I will now throw in a plug for her book, An Ever-Fixéd Mark by Jessie Olson. You can buy copies at local book stores, or directly from her. It's about vampires, and doesn't have Robert Pattinson, so you know it's good. Kids, get permission from Mom and Dad first. This ain't no Twilight, fo' sho'.
So while there to support our friend, I discovered that this particular Annie's is owned by a couple who may possibly be even bigger Doctor Who fans than I am. The didn't just have the current series of books. They had the New Adventures series (which followed the end of the original show and features the 7th and 8th Doctors), plus all the old Missing Adventures novels. They also had an immense selection of the Big Finish audio plays. I've never seen those in any store, EVER. I have a few, and I had to get those online. This place had shelf after shelf of the Doctor Who plays, as well as all the audio spinoffs, and a separate area for used copies.
I don't think I've geeked out that hard in decades.
So that was definitely a good omen for my move, I think. And I'll throw in another plug here for my solo show on the 10th of this month at Leitrim's Pub in Worcester. I'll be doing a set between sets of the band PS Rock, fronted by my buddy James Power. Expect fun, and at least three instances of fumble fingers during the night.
They keep calling Tedeschi's "Country Farms" out here. Is that weird?
And so a new chapter begins. I find myself much calmer right now, as I turned in the keys on Sunday and got the last of my things out of the apartment. I'm a bit melancholy to leave the area, but it's not like it's a three day drive if we want to head back down to visit some time. And who knows, we may end up settling there eventually. There are still one or two matters to deal with to finalize everything, and that might get a little dicey. But for the most part, it's done. With three days to spare.
I know it's not that huge a move, but it does feel a little odd to be a resident of Central Massachusetts, after spending my entire life in the Boston area and suburbs. I don't think I've ever been so landlocked. For someone who likes being near the ocean so much, to be heading in the opposite direction does strike me as funny. Maybe it's only funny to me, but there it is. I don't know why that is, though. I'm still relatively equidistant from Boston and Providence, although a little further away from both than I was before. I still work in the Boston area. I really can't put my finger on it, but there's definitely the feeling that I've crossed some kind of threshold. I'm not saying that as if it's a bad thing. It just feels...different.
I did get a surprise this weekend, however. Jess and I went to a local author's day at the Worcester version of Annie's Book Stop (I don't know if it's only in Massachusetts or not, but if you don't know, it's a chain of franchised-owned used book stores.). One of the local authors just happens to be our roommate, and I will now throw in a plug for her book, An Ever-Fixéd Mark by Jessie Olson. You can buy copies at local book stores, or directly from her. It's about vampires, and doesn't have Robert Pattinson, so you know it's good. Kids, get permission from Mom and Dad first. This ain't no Twilight, fo' sho'.
So while there to support our friend, I discovered that this particular Annie's is owned by a couple who may possibly be even bigger Doctor Who fans than I am. The didn't just have the current series of books. They had the New Adventures series (which followed the end of the original show and features the 7th and 8th Doctors), plus all the old Missing Adventures novels. They also had an immense selection of the Big Finish audio plays. I've never seen those in any store, EVER. I have a few, and I had to get those online. This place had shelf after shelf of the Doctor Who plays, as well as all the audio spinoffs, and a separate area for used copies.
I don't think I've geeked out that hard in decades.
So that was definitely a good omen for my move, I think. And I'll throw in another plug here for my solo show on the 10th of this month at Leitrim's Pub in Worcester. I'll be doing a set between sets of the band PS Rock, fronted by my buddy James Power. Expect fun, and at least three instances of fumble fingers during the night.
They keep calling Tedeschi's "Country Farms" out here. Is that weird?
Friday, November 25, 2011
Black Friday Moving/Music Blog
My alarm went off this morning, and was answered by a round of cursing which could only be described as encyclopedic. I'm not particularly a morning person anyway, never mind the morning after I've consumed a staggering amount of tryptophan. I count myself lucky, though, because with all that's going on in this economy, I have a job that requires I work the day after Thanksgiving. And it doesn't hurt that I'm also not at the mall being shot or pepper sprayed by idiots who are willing to injure others in order to get half off an Xbox. It's a goddamn TOY, stupid. Get some perspective.
This weekend sees the completion of my (and Finn's) move to the Woo. Most everything has been packed up in boxes. we're getting a moving truck to get everything we can out tomorrow, and then getting the last of it and cleaning up on Sunday. Considering the difficulty I've had with the landlord (oh yeah, he never did fix the toilet, garbage disposal, front door, porch light, or leak in the roof), I'm not holding my breath to get the security deposit back. Which doesn't mean I'm not got going to try and collect it. I think he knows by now that I'm fairly well versed on the laws in this regard.
But that's not what I'm concentrating on. I'm focused on the move, settling in, and keeping things rolling in the right direction. I've been offered a short solo set in December (details to follow), and I'm adding more songs to my repertoire. I'm definitely being influenced by guys like Frank Turner and Chuck Ragan, not to mention Billy Bragg. My song choices most certainly veer towards classic punk and alternative. I know that's not necessarily groundbreaking, but I've never claimed to be any kind of pioneer. I like what I like.
And today, for those of you keeping score at home, is day 180 without a drink. Six months. This calls for a song.
Happy weekend...
This weekend sees the completion of my (and Finn's) move to the Woo. Most everything has been packed up in boxes. we're getting a moving truck to get everything we can out tomorrow, and then getting the last of it and cleaning up on Sunday. Considering the difficulty I've had with the landlord (oh yeah, he never did fix the toilet, garbage disposal, front door, porch light, or leak in the roof), I'm not holding my breath to get the security deposit back. Which doesn't mean I'm not got going to try and collect it. I think he knows by now that I'm fairly well versed on the laws in this regard.
But that's not what I'm concentrating on. I'm focused on the move, settling in, and keeping things rolling in the right direction. I've been offered a short solo set in December (details to follow), and I'm adding more songs to my repertoire. I'm definitely being influenced by guys like Frank Turner and Chuck Ragan, not to mention Billy Bragg. My song choices most certainly veer towards classic punk and alternative. I know that's not necessarily groundbreaking, but I've never claimed to be any kind of pioneer. I like what I like.
And today, for those of you keeping score at home, is day 180 without a drink. Six months. This calls for a song.
Happy weekend...
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
The Left Bank of Central Massachusetts
I forgot to mention the other day that, after reading up on the rules for Movember (15 days left! Save the Nuggets (TM)!), I had to modify my entry, because a Van Dyke doesn't count. It has to be a mustache. So what I did was eliminate the hair directly under my bottom lip to create what I like to call the "Lemmy" look. Of course, my daughter was able to bring me back to Earth by telling me I look like Hulk Hogan. Thanks kid. Oh, and by the way, you're gonna be a commuter next semester. Not so funny now, are ya?
I was at my therapy appointment last night, talking about my upcoming move to Worcester, extolling the virtues of the burgeoning arts scene there, when the realization struck me: I'm actually getting very enthusiastic about this. Not that I wasn't looking forward to living with Jess already, not to mention how grateful I am to her and her roommate for even offering me this option. But in the last few months, I've gotten to know some of the more active participants and organizers in the area, and it seems like people are just bursting with enthusiasm about how they can get everyone together and really make a combined effort to promote arts, music, theatre, and local writers. Given my rekindled interest in nearly all of these things, it's like a perfect storm of opportunity for me to really dive in and make it happen.
Sunday's event would never have happened for me if I weren't in a relationship with Jess, so I feel like I have something of a head start. I also have experience and, if I do say so, a modicum of talent. So Jess helps get my foot in the door, and then it's up to me to get the rest of me over the threshold. It doesn't hurt that she's been a very enthusiastic champion of mine from pretty much day one (Thanks, beh-beh!).
Long term, I think we're both still planning on ultimately settling back in North Attleboro Center (but not the same house, natch), but Worcester really is going through a kind of arts and culture renaissance right now, and it's not a little exciting to think that we'll be a part of it.
I know I've mentioned the title "Whisky Witch" when referring to Jess, and I did happen to note that she was pouring at the event on Sunday. But I really should throw a plug in here for her services. If you're someone who wants to learn about whisky in its various forms and styles, or even if you're someone who's an old hand and wants to find something new, you really need to get in touch with her. She is to whisky what Wine Spectator is to wine. I'm not even exaggerating. I've seen more than one person who firmly stated that they didn't like whisky walk away with a new drink of choice. She's that damn good. And she has a blog that is in desperate need of updating (because she's also a very good writer), so I'm going to link it here in order to light a fire under her butt about it.
Don't worry, I haven't fallen off the waggon (180 days as of a week from this Friday. That's six months for those of you who don't believe in long division.), and she actually doesn't drink all that much, either. She's a connoisseur who does her research well and responsibly. Look her up, she will teach you something new.
And with that, I say good day, sir...
I was at my therapy appointment last night, talking about my upcoming move to Worcester, extolling the virtues of the burgeoning arts scene there, when the realization struck me: I'm actually getting very enthusiastic about this. Not that I wasn't looking forward to living with Jess already, not to mention how grateful I am to her and her roommate for even offering me this option. But in the last few months, I've gotten to know some of the more active participants and organizers in the area, and it seems like people are just bursting with enthusiasm about how they can get everyone together and really make a combined effort to promote arts, music, theatre, and local writers. Given my rekindled interest in nearly all of these things, it's like a perfect storm of opportunity for me to really dive in and make it happen.
Sunday's event would never have happened for me if I weren't in a relationship with Jess, so I feel like I have something of a head start. I also have experience and, if I do say so, a modicum of talent. So Jess helps get my foot in the door, and then it's up to me to get the rest of me over the threshold. It doesn't hurt that she's been a very enthusiastic champion of mine from pretty much day one (Thanks, beh-beh!).
Long term, I think we're both still planning on ultimately settling back in North Attleboro Center (but not the same house, natch), but Worcester really is going through a kind of arts and culture renaissance right now, and it's not a little exciting to think that we'll be a part of it.
I know I've mentioned the title "Whisky Witch" when referring to Jess, and I did happen to note that she was pouring at the event on Sunday. But I really should throw a plug in here for her services. If you're someone who wants to learn about whisky in its various forms and styles, or even if you're someone who's an old hand and wants to find something new, you really need to get in touch with her. She is to whisky what Wine Spectator is to wine. I'm not even exaggerating. I've seen more than one person who firmly stated that they didn't like whisky walk away with a new drink of choice. She's that damn good. And she has a blog that is in desperate need of updating (because she's also a very good writer), so I'm going to link it here in order to light a fire under her butt about it.
Don't worry, I haven't fallen off the waggon (180 days as of a week from this Friday. That's six months for those of you who don't believe in long division.), and she actually doesn't drink all that much, either. She's a connoisseur who does her research well and responsibly. Look her up, she will teach you something new.
And with that, I say good day, sir...
Monday, November 14, 2011
A Week Full of Saturdays
Back from vacation. A very nice, slow-paced, relaxing vacation. A week full of Saturdays where, for the most part, I didn't have anywhere I had to be at any particular time. Originally, there was a trip to Ireland planned for the week, but that had to be scrapped for financial reasons, unfortunately. So it became a welcome opportunity for me to just relax, recharge, refocus, and re-a bunch of other things. Jess was off as well, so we were also able to do some planning and preparation for the move in two weeks. I also got to spend some time with my daughter and hear more about the incredible things she's doing in college. I really shouldn't be at this point, but it seems I'm still wowed by her continued accomplishments. And I have no problem with that.
My Movember campaign started off well, but has sort of lost steam. After an initial flurry of contributions, nothing for the last week. I understand, the economy is tough, and this time of year in particular is chock full of different organizations vying for your charitable dollar. Hey, the whole reason I'm doing this is because I don't have the money to give to any or all of the very worthy causes that are asking for help right now. I wanted to do something, and this seemed like an interesting way to do it. So I'm not going to pound down anyone's door asking for money, but if you have the means, I'd really appreciate it. I'll post a picture of the 'stache on the page later today.
One not exactly bad, but still kind of sad thing happened last week as well. I made the decision to leave the Gobshites. There's no acrimony or animosity, I'm not angry at anyone or full of spite or anything like that. I think I just need to strike out on my own for now and see what happens. I'm learning a lot of new instruments and writing lyrics, and I have some idea of what I eventually want my sound to be. So I figured I'd explore that and try to develop it. Am I a bit melancholy? Sure, the last three years have mostly been a blast. But I'm excited as well. I will always be grateful to the Gobshites, and Pete Walsh in particular, for reigniting the musical fire that I feared was buried for good a long time ago. And I've had the pleasure and privilege of playing with and meeting some fantastic people who've played a huge part in my growing self confidence, self esteem, and recovery. Thanks to everyone with whom I've shared a stage, a memory, or a pint. You've all been a huge influence, and I look forward to sharing my new direction with you.
Speaking of which, last night was my first ever solo performance, at Secret Society Tattoo and Art Gallery in Worcester. My nervousness manifested itself in a pounding headache that showed up just as I was about to start. How did I do? Well...everyone told me it sounded great. Unfortunately, all I ever hear are the mistakes. I think it was good that I was more or less the background music for the art exhibit, because it helped me get the first one under my belt without the additional stress of having the entire focus on me. I tried to make it a mix of traditional Irish songs and tunes, as well as some punky folk stuff. And Jess joined me for a couple of songs as well (in between commanding the attention of the whisky connoiseurs in the crowd), which for me were the highlights of the evening. I'm working up a list of songs I'd like to cover, as well as starting a couple of new songs of my own, and trying to pluck out some music for the two I've written so far.
I've also got my fingers crosed at the possibility of new employment in a much more creative atmosphere, and I'm working on getting caught up with everything, packing, and weeding through the crap that I've been lugging around for years, both in the physical and metaphysical sense. I think it's going to be an interesting 2012.
Oh, and the cat says hi...
My Movember campaign started off well, but has sort of lost steam. After an initial flurry of contributions, nothing for the last week. I understand, the economy is tough, and this time of year in particular is chock full of different organizations vying for your charitable dollar. Hey, the whole reason I'm doing this is because I don't have the money to give to any or all of the very worthy causes that are asking for help right now. I wanted to do something, and this seemed like an interesting way to do it. So I'm not going to pound down anyone's door asking for money, but if you have the means, I'd really appreciate it. I'll post a picture of the 'stache on the page later today.
One not exactly bad, but still kind of sad thing happened last week as well. I made the decision to leave the Gobshites. There's no acrimony or animosity, I'm not angry at anyone or full of spite or anything like that. I think I just need to strike out on my own for now and see what happens. I'm learning a lot of new instruments and writing lyrics, and I have some idea of what I eventually want my sound to be. So I figured I'd explore that and try to develop it. Am I a bit melancholy? Sure, the last three years have mostly been a blast. But I'm excited as well. I will always be grateful to the Gobshites, and Pete Walsh in particular, for reigniting the musical fire that I feared was buried for good a long time ago. And I've had the pleasure and privilege of playing with and meeting some fantastic people who've played a huge part in my growing self confidence, self esteem, and recovery. Thanks to everyone with whom I've shared a stage, a memory, or a pint. You've all been a huge influence, and I look forward to sharing my new direction with you.
Speaking of which, last night was my first ever solo performance, at Secret Society Tattoo and Art Gallery in Worcester. My nervousness manifested itself in a pounding headache that showed up just as I was about to start. How did I do? Well...everyone told me it sounded great. Unfortunately, all I ever hear are the mistakes. I think it was good that I was more or less the background music for the art exhibit, because it helped me get the first one under my belt without the additional stress of having the entire focus on me. I tried to make it a mix of traditional Irish songs and tunes, as well as some punky folk stuff. And Jess joined me for a couple of songs as well (in between commanding the attention of the whisky connoiseurs in the crowd), which for me were the highlights of the evening. I'm working up a list of songs I'd like to cover, as well as starting a couple of new songs of my own, and trying to pluck out some music for the two I've written so far.
I've also got my fingers crosed at the possibility of new employment in a much more creative atmosphere, and I'm working on getting caught up with everything, packing, and weeding through the crap that I've been lugging around for years, both in the physical and metaphysical sense. I think it's going to be an interesting 2012.
Oh, and the cat says hi...
Friday, November 04, 2011
Happy Movember!/Friday Music Blog
Okay, so I'm taking part in a fundraising effort called Movember. Each November, men grow their mustaches to help raise awareness and money to benefit men's health issues, specifically prostate cancer, and other cancers that affect men. I even have my own page for the cause here.
I've decided to go with the Van Dyke, because I think just a mustache on me would look goofy. Also because my beard shows the red highlights, which people don't get to see too often. That's the Irish Viking in me. I haven't posted a picture on the site yet, but that's coming soon, probably even later today.
Now, lest you think this is just an excuse for me not to shave for a month, let me tell you my motivation. In 1997, my father was diagnosed with throat cancer. After getting all of his options for treatment, he chose a very rigorous course of radiation which, over five weeks, completely nailed it. It left him both physically and emotionally drained for a while, but he beat it. In 2009, a spot was found on one of his kidneys. They couldn't get to the tumor itself, and so the kidney had to come out. This year, another spot was found in his lung. This time, they could remove the spot, which they did. Each time, it was a different cancer, unrelated to the previous occurrences. Each time, they got it all. Each time, he had some part of his body invaded; first by the cancer, then by the treatment. Each time, he took it like he takes just about everything: Quietly, determinedly, with little to no complaint (that I ever saw, anyway).
Cancer took his older sister when I was 14, and his youngest brother a few years ago. He was eight years older than I am. Two years ago, because of my family history and at the recommendation of my doctor, I had a colonoscopy which found a polyp that, had I waited, would most likely have become cancerous in a few years. My family's got skin in the game, literally.
So I'm growing my Van Dyke for November to try and help. I know the last few years have been a financial train wreck for a lot of folks. If you can, please click on my link and donate. Or get involved yourself (yes, women can participate too). If you can't, I completely understand, and you don't have to avoid eye contact with me.
And now, for your dancing pleasure (and because I saw him at the Middle East this week, plus he's mustachioed/bearded as well), I give you Frank Turner:
I've decided to go with the Van Dyke, because I think just a mustache on me would look goofy. Also because my beard shows the red highlights, which people don't get to see too often. That's the Irish Viking in me. I haven't posted a picture on the site yet, but that's coming soon, probably even later today.
Now, lest you think this is just an excuse for me not to shave for a month, let me tell you my motivation. In 1997, my father was diagnosed with throat cancer. After getting all of his options for treatment, he chose a very rigorous course of radiation which, over five weeks, completely nailed it. It left him both physically and emotionally drained for a while, but he beat it. In 2009, a spot was found on one of his kidneys. They couldn't get to the tumor itself, and so the kidney had to come out. This year, another spot was found in his lung. This time, they could remove the spot, which they did. Each time, it was a different cancer, unrelated to the previous occurrences. Each time, they got it all. Each time, he had some part of his body invaded; first by the cancer, then by the treatment. Each time, he took it like he takes just about everything: Quietly, determinedly, with little to no complaint (that I ever saw, anyway).
Cancer took his older sister when I was 14, and his youngest brother a few years ago. He was eight years older than I am. Two years ago, because of my family history and at the recommendation of my doctor, I had a colonoscopy which found a polyp that, had I waited, would most likely have become cancerous in a few years. My family's got skin in the game, literally.
So I'm growing my Van Dyke for November to try and help. I know the last few years have been a financial train wreck for a lot of folks. If you can, please click on my link and donate. Or get involved yourself (yes, women can participate too). If you can't, I completely understand, and you don't have to avoid eye contact with me.
And now, for your dancing pleasure (and because I saw him at the Middle East this week, plus he's mustachioed/bearded as well), I give you Frank Turner:
Monday, October 31, 2011
Making Like A Tree...
It snowed this weekend. Snowed.
SNOWED!!!!
It's October. And last night it was freezing cold and snowing. Shut the front door (I usually say this with one hand on my hip and my finger waving in the air). Okay, it's the end of October, but still, there are still leaves on the trees. I'm not ready for this. Ugh.
Oh, and by the way, the next person that says "So much for global warming, huh?" in front of me gets a face full of angry bees. Never mind where I got them.
Normally, I'd roll with something like this. It's snow, I live in New England, it's not like I'm entirely new to the concept of white, fluffy precipitation. In truth, the real hardship for me this time around is that the heat in my apartment hasn't been working. I have a small space heater, but it just barely keeps my bedroom somewhat warmish. I found out the heat wasn't working nearly two weeks ago, and notified my landlord immediately. Until yesterday, zero action and a lot of talk. Unfortunately, when it comes to this kind of thing, this is more or less par for the course. November will be my last month in this house, and it seems like he's in no hurry whatsoever to fix anything that's wrong. Some of these problems have existed for at least a year. In the case of the heat, I'm pretty sure he knew he could be held liable for damages if he didn't do anything. Otherwise, either he doesn't know the laws, or he's hoping I don't.
His problem with me, and I completely understand this by the way, is that I've had trouble making the rent on time this year. Believe me, it's not because I don't feel like it. Nothing would make me happier than to be able to make the rent deposit on the first of each month like clockwork. No worries, no bullshit. I've already gone into my difficulties in finding ways to supplement my income. It's made things stressful for me financially, which is really the only negative thing in my life right now. I mean, at least I have a job. But I'm definitely part of the 99%. So yes, I have no argument with him regarding my rent being late for the last few months (although last month it was paid on time, actually a few days ahead of time).
My problem with him, which he doesn't seem to get, or doesn't care about (or more likely a combination of the two), is that as diligent as he is about collecting the rent, he definitely doesn't carry that sense of urgency over to keeping the house in good repair. He's made threats to do things he's legally not allowed to do (And made them via text message, no less. Hello, lawsuit), and retaliated in very petty ways when I've pointed that out to him. He's put the house on the market, so I have no faith that he'll actually address the other problems with the apartment. I'm actually convinced that he never wanted to be a landlord in the first place. I'm guessing he bought the house with the intention of flipping it, and when he couldn't do that right away, resorted to renting it out to pay the mortgage. He never had any intention of dealing with the things that landlords have to deal with, and is trying to get away with doing things around here as cheaply as possible, or not at all.
So this will be my last month here. I'll be shacking up with Jess and her roommate for a bit to save some money and catch up on things as much as I can. But I like the area I'm in, and want to find another place there as soon as I can. Jess likes it too, and so maybe down the road we'll both be settling there. In the meantime we're getting things together and getting the cat accustomed to his new surroundings. It sounds more stressful than it really is. I'm also working to come up with a set list for the Secret Society gig. I talked with the organizer last night at the Cirque du Noir event in Worcester, and I think it's going to be a lot of fun.
Moving out, moving in, moving on. Putting the bad mojo behind me, getting new ideas and acting on them, and letting my freak flag fly unfettered by the self-doubt that's plagued me for nearly my entire life. And I've passed the five month mark of sobriety. Lots and lots and lots of good things. More to follow.
SNOWED!!!!
It's October. And last night it was freezing cold and snowing. Shut the front door (I usually say this with one hand on my hip and my finger waving in the air). Okay, it's the end of October, but still, there are still leaves on the trees. I'm not ready for this. Ugh.
Oh, and by the way, the next person that says "So much for global warming, huh?" in front of me gets a face full of angry bees. Never mind where I got them.
Normally, I'd roll with something like this. It's snow, I live in New England, it's not like I'm entirely new to the concept of white, fluffy precipitation. In truth, the real hardship for me this time around is that the heat in my apartment hasn't been working. I have a small space heater, but it just barely keeps my bedroom somewhat warmish. I found out the heat wasn't working nearly two weeks ago, and notified my landlord immediately. Until yesterday, zero action and a lot of talk. Unfortunately, when it comes to this kind of thing, this is more or less par for the course. November will be my last month in this house, and it seems like he's in no hurry whatsoever to fix anything that's wrong. Some of these problems have existed for at least a year. In the case of the heat, I'm pretty sure he knew he could be held liable for damages if he didn't do anything. Otherwise, either he doesn't know the laws, or he's hoping I don't.
His problem with me, and I completely understand this by the way, is that I've had trouble making the rent on time this year. Believe me, it's not because I don't feel like it. Nothing would make me happier than to be able to make the rent deposit on the first of each month like clockwork. No worries, no bullshit. I've already gone into my difficulties in finding ways to supplement my income. It's made things stressful for me financially, which is really the only negative thing in my life right now. I mean, at least I have a job. But I'm definitely part of the 99%. So yes, I have no argument with him regarding my rent being late for the last few months (although last month it was paid on time, actually a few days ahead of time).
My problem with him, which he doesn't seem to get, or doesn't care about (or more likely a combination of the two), is that as diligent as he is about collecting the rent, he definitely doesn't carry that sense of urgency over to keeping the house in good repair. He's made threats to do things he's legally not allowed to do (And made them via text message, no less. Hello, lawsuit), and retaliated in very petty ways when I've pointed that out to him. He's put the house on the market, so I have no faith that he'll actually address the other problems with the apartment. I'm actually convinced that he never wanted to be a landlord in the first place. I'm guessing he bought the house with the intention of flipping it, and when he couldn't do that right away, resorted to renting it out to pay the mortgage. He never had any intention of dealing with the things that landlords have to deal with, and is trying to get away with doing things around here as cheaply as possible, or not at all.
So this will be my last month here. I'll be shacking up with Jess and her roommate for a bit to save some money and catch up on things as much as I can. But I like the area I'm in, and want to find another place there as soon as I can. Jess likes it too, and so maybe down the road we'll both be settling there. In the meantime we're getting things together and getting the cat accustomed to his new surroundings. It sounds more stressful than it really is. I'm also working to come up with a set list for the Secret Society gig. I talked with the organizer last night at the Cirque du Noir event in Worcester, and I think it's going to be a lot of fun.
Moving out, moving in, moving on. Putting the bad mojo behind me, getting new ideas and acting on them, and letting my freak flag fly unfettered by the self-doubt that's plagued me for nearly my entire life. And I've passed the five month mark of sobriety. Lots and lots and lots of good things. More to follow.
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Drawing A Blank Deck
So it seems all I needed to do to find blank skate decks was type http://www.blankdecks.com/ into my browser. Who knew? As it turns out, Jess did. I think I'm going to order just one now, and see how it goes. They have pretty cheap bulk deals, too. And and AND, they have old school style decks (from the days when they were a little wider, and not all the same size and shape). Sweet. I haven't actually skated since college, so I'm not sure about the standard shaped decks these days. Does that make me a grumpy old man? "You kids, with your narrow decks and your hot rods and your MTV!" I don't think I'm that bad, I just like what I like. Nevertheless, I am open-minded about it, and will likely try one in the near future.
Still looking around for some kind of drawing course. There's really no adult learning center in my immediate area, unless I want to get my CPR certification or a nursing license. There are classes in Providence, but that would only work well if I were working in the city. It'd be kind of a pain to get out of work in North Quincy and have to truck on down to my class every week. But as I'm going to be spending at least a couple of months in Worcester after November (more on that later), I did find some stuff in and around the area there. And I'm trying to sketch as much as I can in the meantime, so as to shake off the rust.
I read a lot of tattoo magazines, and some of the art in them is just incredible, and it's really lighting a fire under me to ramp up my own artistic efforts. I don't know that I'll ever be as good as the work I see in the magazines or online, but it'd be neat to have a piece of flash that I designed show up on someones arm or something. And maybe, down the road, I'll pick up a tattoo gun myself and try it out. Who knows?
Today is a new moon, which means new beginnings, and personally, it's also day 150 of my recovery. What does this all mean? I think for me, it means it's time to refocus on keeping up with the changes I've made in the past five months, and decide the next steps to take. I want to do everything, all at once and forever. But I know from experience that that kind of thinking can very easily stop me in my tracks and overwhelm me. So I need to find some way to strike a balance between all of my pursuits, so that all of them get a chance to breathe and grow. Just as I need to get back into exercising my physical muscles, I need to let my creative muscles have some time on the treadmill, so that I don't let them atrophy again.
And then I want to go to Europe...
Still looking around for some kind of drawing course. There's really no adult learning center in my immediate area, unless I want to get my CPR certification or a nursing license. There are classes in Providence, but that would only work well if I were working in the city. It'd be kind of a pain to get out of work in North Quincy and have to truck on down to my class every week. But as I'm going to be spending at least a couple of months in Worcester after November (more on that later), I did find some stuff in and around the area there. And I'm trying to sketch as much as I can in the meantime, so as to shake off the rust.
I read a lot of tattoo magazines, and some of the art in them is just incredible, and it's really lighting a fire under me to ramp up my own artistic efforts. I don't know that I'll ever be as good as the work I see in the magazines or online, but it'd be neat to have a piece of flash that I designed show up on someones arm or something. And maybe, down the road, I'll pick up a tattoo gun myself and try it out. Who knows?
Today is a new moon, which means new beginnings, and personally, it's also day 150 of my recovery. What does this all mean? I think for me, it means it's time to refocus on keeping up with the changes I've made in the past five months, and decide the next steps to take. I want to do everything, all at once and forever. But I know from experience that that kind of thinking can very easily stop me in my tracks and overwhelm me. So I need to find some way to strike a balance between all of my pursuits, so that all of them get a chance to breathe and grow. Just as I need to get back into exercising my physical muscles, I need to let my creative muscles have some time on the treadmill, so that I don't let them atrophy again.
And then I want to go to Europe...
Friday, October 21, 2011
They See Me Rollin'...
Cool article on Boston.com yesterday about artists using skateboards as their medium. I haven't been as diligent regarding my drawing as I had hoped to be. I may be taking on too many things, or I just need to organize my time better maybe. With all of the new music, writing, and artistic endeavors I'm taking on, or want to take on, it seems there aren't enough hours in the day. It doesn't help my scheduling ability that my day job doesn't have a set schedule. I'm hoping that will change soon (as always). But the skateboard-as-canvas things is really interesting. We all used to have skateboards that had graphics on them. Among mine were a Santa Cruz Rob Roskopp (the one on the left), a Skull Skates Hardcore deck (couldn't find an image online for that), and a Skull Skates Gang Green deck. All but the Hardcore deck remain, the other two having been stolen. Alas.
You can get blank skate decks, and maybe I could organize a group of folks to get together to have an arts and crafts day involving skateboards. Might be fun. Maybe Secret Society will give us a showing. And that reminds me to throw in another plug for my upcoming solo gig there on November 13. It's the opening for their latest show featuring mixed media work by Rosemary LeBeau. It'll be my first appearance in public playing the mandolin, so please be gentle if you come see it. I'll also have the whistles and bodhran at the ready.
Speaking of plugs, the Gobshites have a Kickstarter campaign going to raise money for the Ireland trip project. We've got Richie Ramone (of the Ramones) and Cait O'Riordan (original Pogues bass player) as the rhythm section, and the CD will consist of all original songs. The working title is "The Whistle Before the Snap." If you can, click this link to pledge. If not, I understand, you don't have to avoid eye contact with me. We're trying to get $5,000.00, and we have 14 days to go. If you do pledge, there are a lot of cool premiums depending on the amount. Please check it out if you can. Unfortunately, scheduling and finances prevent me from going over with the rest of the band, so I'm going to have to record my parts back here.
I think I might have mentioned this before, but I'm seriously considering building my own bodhran. There are a few sites online that have instructions. The only thing I need now is time and materials. My dream drum is way out of my price range at this point, and I think it'd be a fun project. Just have to figure out where to get a decent goat skin, and what kind of wood I want to use.
Went to a really great show last weekend in Providence to see the Usual Suspects and the Uprisers, featuring Todd Radict on vocals, as well as former members of the Bruisers. Didn't find any video for the Uprisers, so I'm going to close with this old Radicts video from the 80's. Don't let the door hit you in the face...
You can get blank skate decks, and maybe I could organize a group of folks to get together to have an arts and crafts day involving skateboards. Might be fun. Maybe Secret Society will give us a showing. And that reminds me to throw in another plug for my upcoming solo gig there on November 13. It's the opening for their latest show featuring mixed media work by Rosemary LeBeau. It'll be my first appearance in public playing the mandolin, so please be gentle if you come see it. I'll also have the whistles and bodhran at the ready.
Speaking of plugs, the Gobshites have a Kickstarter campaign going to raise money for the Ireland trip project. We've got Richie Ramone (of the Ramones) and Cait O'Riordan (original Pogues bass player) as the rhythm section, and the CD will consist of all original songs. The working title is "The Whistle Before the Snap." If you can, click this link to pledge. If not, I understand, you don't have to avoid eye contact with me. We're trying to get $5,000.00, and we have 14 days to go. If you do pledge, there are a lot of cool premiums depending on the amount. Please check it out if you can. Unfortunately, scheduling and finances prevent me from going over with the rest of the band, so I'm going to have to record my parts back here.
I think I might have mentioned this before, but I'm seriously considering building my own bodhran. There are a few sites online that have instructions. The only thing I need now is time and materials. My dream drum is way out of my price range at this point, and I think it'd be a fun project. Just have to figure out where to get a decent goat skin, and what kind of wood I want to use.
Went to a really great show last weekend in Providence to see the Usual Suspects and the Uprisers, featuring Todd Radict on vocals, as well as former members of the Bruisers. Didn't find any video for the Uprisers, so I'm going to close with this old Radicts video from the 80's. Don't let the door hit you in the face...
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Another One About Music
Add electronic bagpipes to the list. The band bought a set a few months ago, and they were given to me to figure out. Because they're electronic, I don't need to work on breathing technique, so it's just a matter of getting the fingering down. I predict virtuosity within a week. Give or take a year.
I'll be doing my first solo acoustic performance next month at Secret Society Gallery and Tattoo. It's an opening for an art exhibit, and I'll be the background music. Jess will be pouring whisky, as usual, and maybe I can coax her into doing a song or two with me. I'm actually kind of excited and very nervous at the same time. I've never performed solo before, so this is going to be a major hurdle for me. Plus, the fact that the art on the walls will be the main focus of the show means any mistakes or flubs I make wont seem so glaring. I'm thinking, obviously, of doing some traditional Irish reels and jigs on the whistle, maybe a few a Capella songs, accompanying myself on bodhran, and some mandolin. If I decide to do Wagon Wheel, which I most likely will, I'll need to bring the banjo as well. Otherwise the second verse makes no sense. I don't know that there's any pay for this, but again I'm not worried about that so much, because I'm using this more as a learning experience. But maybe I can get Jeff or Danny at the shop to work out some kind of trade deal...
Heh, kidding.
Not really.
But I'm also thinking maybe I should get some business cards or something, because if this works out well, it could mean another avenue for me creatively. I've written lyrics for one or two songs over the past few years. I'd like to start writing the music to go with them. I get tunes in my head all the time, but I don't know how to write them out on a staff. I try to figure it out on the whistle sometimes, but for whatever reason it doesn't translate. It's tough being a musical genius with no understanding of theory.
Heh, kidding.
Not really.
Okay, this time I really am.
Have some of this:
I'll be doing my first solo acoustic performance next month at Secret Society Gallery and Tattoo. It's an opening for an art exhibit, and I'll be the background music. Jess will be pouring whisky, as usual, and maybe I can coax her into doing a song or two with me. I'm actually kind of excited and very nervous at the same time. I've never performed solo before, so this is going to be a major hurdle for me. Plus, the fact that the art on the walls will be the main focus of the show means any mistakes or flubs I make wont seem so glaring. I'm thinking, obviously, of doing some traditional Irish reels and jigs on the whistle, maybe a few a Capella songs, accompanying myself on bodhran, and some mandolin. If I decide to do Wagon Wheel, which I most likely will, I'll need to bring the banjo as well. Otherwise the second verse makes no sense. I don't know that there's any pay for this, but again I'm not worried about that so much, because I'm using this more as a learning experience. But maybe I can get Jeff or Danny at the shop to work out some kind of trade deal...
Heh, kidding.
Not really.
But I'm also thinking maybe I should get some business cards or something, because if this works out well, it could mean another avenue for me creatively. I've written lyrics for one or two songs over the past few years. I'd like to start writing the music to go with them. I get tunes in my head all the time, but I don't know how to write them out on a staff. I try to figure it out on the whistle sometimes, but for whatever reason it doesn't translate. It's tough being a musical genius with no understanding of theory.
Heh, kidding.
Not really.
Okay, this time I really am.
Have some of this:
Friday, October 07, 2011
Friday Music Blog: Positive Reinforcement Edition
ZOMG!!!!!!!1!!!1! Scary skinheads! Lock up the valu...wait, what did he just say? "You've got a friend"? Who do they think they are, friggin' James Taylor or something?!?
*sigh*
Nobody lives up to their stereotype anymore...
Monday, October 03, 2011
Triggers
I was listening to Chris Titus' "Norman Rockwell is Bleeding" CD last night, specifically the bit where he talks about his mother's death, and the fact that he couldn't really deal with it until all of his memories of her came back in one instant while eating dinner on an airplane. It made me think of things in my own life that have triggered memories at unexpected times.
A few years back, I was working in downtown Boston. I was also living in the city at the time, so I took the subway into work every day. On nice days, I could get off at Park Street station and walk through Boston Common and the Boston Public Garden every morning and afternoon. I really enjoyed that part of my day. It was definitely a better way to get to work than sit in traffic or stand in a cramped train moving through dark tunnels. It was also a lot healthier.
One afternoon, while walking past the playground on the Common, I saw a little girl and her parents heading toward the swing set. When the girl realized where they were going, she broke away from her parents and started running to it, absolutely elated, all the while shouting "I wanna swing! I wanna swing!" It was such a genuine moment of pure, innocent joy, that I just couldn't move from the spot I was in. I stood there, watching, for several minutes. I'm not ashamed to admit that I even teared up a little (Which isn't as strange as it might sound. It's not all that unusual to see someone standing by themselves and crying on the Common. Most folks probably just assumed I was a well dressed homeless person).
The whole scene brought up such a powerful memory of my own daughter at that age, and how enthusiastic she was about absolutely everything she did. I've written this year about her going to college, and about coming to terms with the fact that she's now an adult, and no longer my little girl. Those things are all true, and I've found that I'm actually having an okay time of it, because I know she's got a good head on her shoulders and she's smart and resourceful. Of course I've been thinking about her childhood, and the memories of all the fun I tried to make sure she had, the lessons I hope she learned from me, and also of all those things I'd love to have a chance to do again, or even do differently. But nothing has ever triggered such a strong emotional reaction as that one day on Boston Common.
Now that she's a month into her college experience, I find my confidence in her ability to adjust to this new lifestyle is entirely justified. The little girl who was so enthusiastic about everything she did is now the young woman who runs her own life and has managed to navigate a whole new world. We've helped her with moving and supplies, but she's taken it from there and is thriving. I'd like to think I've had something to do with that. And I hope she stays as enthusiastic as the girl who put all that she had into the first 18 years of her life. It's one of the things I've tried to learn from her...
A few years back, I was working in downtown Boston. I was also living in the city at the time, so I took the subway into work every day. On nice days, I could get off at Park Street station and walk through Boston Common and the Boston Public Garden every morning and afternoon. I really enjoyed that part of my day. It was definitely a better way to get to work than sit in traffic or stand in a cramped train moving through dark tunnels. It was also a lot healthier.
One afternoon, while walking past the playground on the Common, I saw a little girl and her parents heading toward the swing set. When the girl realized where they were going, she broke away from her parents and started running to it, absolutely elated, all the while shouting "I wanna swing! I wanna swing!" It was such a genuine moment of pure, innocent joy, that I just couldn't move from the spot I was in. I stood there, watching, for several minutes. I'm not ashamed to admit that I even teared up a little (Which isn't as strange as it might sound. It's not all that unusual to see someone standing by themselves and crying on the Common. Most folks probably just assumed I was a well dressed homeless person).
The whole scene brought up such a powerful memory of my own daughter at that age, and how enthusiastic she was about absolutely everything she did. I've written this year about her going to college, and about coming to terms with the fact that she's now an adult, and no longer my little girl. Those things are all true, and I've found that I'm actually having an okay time of it, because I know she's got a good head on her shoulders and she's smart and resourceful. Of course I've been thinking about her childhood, and the memories of all the fun I tried to make sure she had, the lessons I hope she learned from me, and also of all those things I'd love to have a chance to do again, or even do differently. But nothing has ever triggered such a strong emotional reaction as that one day on Boston Common.
Now that she's a month into her college experience, I find my confidence in her ability to adjust to this new lifestyle is entirely justified. The little girl who was so enthusiastic about everything she did is now the young woman who runs her own life and has managed to navigate a whole new world. We've helped her with moving and supplies, but she's taken it from there and is thriving. I'd like to think I've had something to do with that. And I hope she stays as enthusiastic as the girl who put all that she had into the first 18 years of her life. It's one of the things I've tried to learn from her...
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Cool Story Brah!
I forgot to mention this in my post about wanting to open a book store, but this is National Banned Books Week. I first became aware of such a week when I was working at a bookstore in a mall in Taunton. I was still in college, my mother was a high school reading specialist, and she explained what it was all about. Being the idealistic youth that I was, I thought it would be a great idea for my store to put up some kind of display to commemorate it. I was a little taken aback when they were hesitant. There was all kinds of talk about having to run it through corporate (we were part of a chain) and would this turn people off, et. cetera. For the life of me, I couldn't understand why they weren't embracing the idea (I know, young and naive). Why wouldn't a bookstore, of all places, want to celebrate the First Ammendment?
After a little back and forth, it was decided that I could put up a display. But not in the front window display area. I was to create my tribute to thought on the wall behind the registers. Fair enough, I said, at least they're letting me do it. I think the front window was devoted to kids' Halloween reading, like R.L. Stine and such. I contacted the American Library Association to get some materials, including posters and some pins to give out, and a list of the then top 100 banned or challenged books in the US. I hand wrote bookmarks for each book on the display, detailing the nature of the ban or challenge. I purposefully included books that were pretty popular, or books that most people wouldn't think of as being all that controversial by authors like Roald Dahl. C.S. Lewis, and Judy Blume, as well as the Bible.
I think the management was hoping it would just be something small that no one would notice, but it definitely got attention. Folks took pictures, sometimes with me standing in front. And not a few people, having made it up to the register to check out, decided to buy one of the banned books on the wall as well. The managers were, shall we say, tepid in their acknowledgement of the display's success, but I was thrilled. I had stood up for the freedom to read, write, and think whatever you wanted. And I did it in a mall, no less. I even kept one of the posters to hang on my bedroom wall when the week was done.
Looking back, I think that may have been the catalyst for me wanting to open my own bookstore. The fact that I was hosting my college radio station's punk show helped inspire the idea of combining books and records (not exactly a revolutionary concept, I realize). As I flesh out my idea a little more, I'll keep posting updates. And of course if/when this ever becomes a reality, you're all invited to the grand opening.
Now Dance...
After a little back and forth, it was decided that I could put up a display. But not in the front window display area. I was to create my tribute to thought on the wall behind the registers. Fair enough, I said, at least they're letting me do it. I think the front window was devoted to kids' Halloween reading, like R.L. Stine and such. I contacted the American Library Association to get some materials, including posters and some pins to give out, and a list of the then top 100 banned or challenged books in the US. I hand wrote bookmarks for each book on the display, detailing the nature of the ban or challenge. I purposefully included books that were pretty popular, or books that most people wouldn't think of as being all that controversial by authors like Roald Dahl. C.S. Lewis, and Judy Blume, as well as the Bible.
I think the management was hoping it would just be something small that no one would notice, but it definitely got attention. Folks took pictures, sometimes with me standing in front. And not a few people, having made it up to the register to check out, decided to buy one of the banned books on the wall as well. The managers were, shall we say, tepid in their acknowledgement of the display's success, but I was thrilled. I had stood up for the freedom to read, write, and think whatever you wanted. And I did it in a mall, no less. I even kept one of the posters to hang on my bedroom wall when the week was done.
Looking back, I think that may have been the catalyst for me wanting to open my own bookstore. The fact that I was hosting my college radio station's punk show helped inspire the idea of combining books and records (not exactly a revolutionary concept, I realize). As I flesh out my idea a little more, I'll keep posting updates. And of course if/when this ever becomes a reality, you're all invited to the grand opening.
Now Dance...
Monday, September 26, 2011
A Walk in the Clouds (of My Head)
First up, thanks to big Johnny Murphy at Shite 'N' Onions for reposting my Shamrock-N-Roll blog on his site last week. It's always nice to find out that someone likes your work enough to associate their name with it. And he's asked me to do an interview and album review for the new Radiators From Space CD (Phil Chevron of the Pogues' other band). John's one of the really good guys in the Irish rock scene, and I'm glad he's got the confidence in me to do this. Go raibh maith agat, sir.
I like walking through my downtown. I've started doing it a lot lately, both on my own and with Jess when she's down. It's a cool little three or four block strip of different kinds of businesses, services, and stores. And hair salons (Sweet Christ, there are a lot of hair salons. You can't go half a block without smelling burning hair. After a while it's kind of soothing, actually.). There's a tattoo shop, a few restaurants, bars, a couple of sub shops, an alternative food market, a witchcraft supply store/gift shop, a thrift shop or two, a novelty store/head shop, et. cetera. Pretty standard fare for a blue collar, working class town.
Like most small(ish) towns, there are also one or two empty storefronts along the way. Some of them still have the signage from what used to be there. One or two show signs of someone renovating for a new business. Every time I see one of these places, no matter where I am, my mind starts to wander, and I think about what I'd do with the space, given the chance. It's sort of my own version of the old guidance counselor question, "What do you want to do with your life?"
The only thing I've ever really concluded is that I'd like to open a book and music store. And it would likely lean towards the alternative/underground/punk sensibility, both in my choice of stock and in atmosphere. Really, I've wanted to do this since college. Of course, this is back in the late 80's/early 90's, and even then the independent book store and record store (Yeah, I still call them record stores. I also still use the term "album" to describe a band's newest release. You can't change me, so don't even try.) was an endangered species. But you can still find them here and there. And if a tattoo shop (next door to an insurance agency) and a witchcraft store (that isn't in Salem), not to mention a store devoted entirely to yarn, can survive these days, why not a place where folks can get music and literature that's a little bit off the beaten path?
I know, know...it's hard to start your own business, most small businesses don't survive, blah blah blah... Well so what? It's not like people haven't been trying to discourage me from doing what I've wanted to do for most of my life. I decided to stop listening to them, and now I'm writing again, performing again, and setting goals again. Am I going to do this tomorrow? No, I've got other things I need to take care of first. But if, 20 or so years later, I still keep coming back to this idea, then that must mean something. It could mean I'm an unrealistic daydreamer, or it could mean that this is what I was always meant to do. I'm going to go on the assumption that it's a little bit of both, with an emphasis in the latter.
I've been wrong before, and I'm still alive. Sometimes, you just gotta get over your fears and do it.
I'm still never going bungie jumping...or eating mushrooms...
I like walking through my downtown. I've started doing it a lot lately, both on my own and with Jess when she's down. It's a cool little three or four block strip of different kinds of businesses, services, and stores. And hair salons (Sweet Christ, there are a lot of hair salons. You can't go half a block without smelling burning hair. After a while it's kind of soothing, actually.). There's a tattoo shop, a few restaurants, bars, a couple of sub shops, an alternative food market, a witchcraft supply store/gift shop, a thrift shop or two, a novelty store/head shop, et. cetera. Pretty standard fare for a blue collar, working class town.
Like most small(ish) towns, there are also one or two empty storefronts along the way. Some of them still have the signage from what used to be there. One or two show signs of someone renovating for a new business. Every time I see one of these places, no matter where I am, my mind starts to wander, and I think about what I'd do with the space, given the chance. It's sort of my own version of the old guidance counselor question, "What do you want to do with your life?"
The only thing I've ever really concluded is that I'd like to open a book and music store. And it would likely lean towards the alternative/underground/punk sensibility, both in my choice of stock and in atmosphere. Really, I've wanted to do this since college. Of course, this is back in the late 80's/early 90's, and even then the independent book store and record store (Yeah, I still call them record stores. I also still use the term "album" to describe a band's newest release. You can't change me, so don't even try.) was an endangered species. But you can still find them here and there. And if a tattoo shop (next door to an insurance agency) and a witchcraft store (that isn't in Salem), not to mention a store devoted entirely to yarn, can survive these days, why not a place where folks can get music and literature that's a little bit off the beaten path?
I know, know...it's hard to start your own business, most small businesses don't survive, blah blah blah... Well so what? It's not like people haven't been trying to discourage me from doing what I've wanted to do for most of my life. I decided to stop listening to them, and now I'm writing again, performing again, and setting goals again. Am I going to do this tomorrow? No, I've got other things I need to take care of first. But if, 20 or so years later, I still keep coming back to this idea, then that must mean something. It could mean I'm an unrealistic daydreamer, or it could mean that this is what I was always meant to do. I'm going to go on the assumption that it's a little bit of both, with an emphasis in the latter.
I've been wrong before, and I'm still alive. Sometimes, you just gotta get over your fears and do it.
I'm still never going bungie jumping...or eating mushrooms...
Friday, September 23, 2011
Coincidentally, This is Also How I Feel About Chicken
Been a little dry this week, but I saw this on a message board I frequent, and...um...wow...
Thanks to Big Duane at Sailor's Grave for sharing this with me, that I may also share it with you.
Thanks to Big Duane at Sailor's Grave for sharing this with me, that I may also share it with you.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)