Wait...What?!?

Years ago I was in a club in Providence, waiting to see Neutral Nation.  Just sitting there, minding my own business, drinking a beer, when a woman walked up to me and complimented me on my hair.  I had very long hair back then.  I was a rocker.  I thanked her, and she explained to me that she was a hairdresser, so she tended to notice things like that.  I thanked her agian.  Well, she then explained, she was a hairdresser and a stripper.  "Huh" I replied.  "Cool."  I returned to my beer and watching the stage.  She stood there for a few more moments, and then walked away.  That was the end of the conversation.

Here's the point:  It never once occured to me that she was hitting on me.  My mind just doesn't work like that.  Whether it's a lack of self-confidence (in this case), or some part of my mind just isn't wired for subtlety (although looking back, I guess she wasn't really being all that subtle), but I'm just thick that way.  You really need to stand right in front of me sometimes, and maybe even hit me over the head, for me to see what you're getting at.

That's weird, right?  I mean, I spent over a decade on the standup comedy circuit, I'm an avid reader, writer, and reasonably sharp guy in general.  So why do things just pass right over my head like that?  I have no idea.  And it's not even all the time.  At least I don't think so.  It could be that things go by without me noticing constantly.  Am I just distracted?  Is it a symptom of ADHD?  A friend once told me that I displayed many characteristics of Asperger's Syndrome, although I've been assured by professionals that this is not the case.

Whatever it is, it's frustrating, that's for sure.  I think it creates the impression in people that I'm either aloof, self-centered, or just a jerk.  I really hate that, because I think of myself in the exact opposite way.  I'm not a jerk, and I'm not the least aloof.  I know I can be self-centered, but no moreso that anyone else, really.  I have empathy, and I care deeply about many things and many people.  And many times, I really am listening, but I don't know how to react to things, or even whether I should.  What does that say about me?

What the eff is wrong with me?!?