A: If you hold it up to your ear, you can hear the ocean...
I feel like a broken record sometimes, when I talk about my problems with money. Right now, I am once again in a situation where my back is against the wall. I have no money whatsoever, and my rent's overdue. My car payment's overdue. My cable and phone bills are overdue. My car need s new brakes and whatever the hell else is necessary to get it to pass inspection. And I have no money. Since about February, I've been seriously looking for ways to supplement my income in order to afford the rent that doubled as of May 1st. I signed a new lease for one year last December, and I intend to honor it. Am I being foolish? Probably, but I really have no other place to go. I don't have the money for a first and last for a new place, and even if I did, then I'd have the money to pay my rent for this month, so what would be the point of moving?
At first, I tried looking for a new roommate. But the only serious inquiry I got from my online postings came from someone who would be moving here from the other side of the country, and really didn't want to meet my new roommate on the first day they lived here. I had also come to decide that I really didn't want a new roommate anyway. I didn't want to have to share my place with someone I didn't know, and I wanted to try and live on my own. It's been a struggle, to say the least. No doubt it was a factor in the ramping up of my drinking problem. As my worry over paying my bills got worse, the desire to escape and numb myself got greater. And so I ended up spending money I didn't have to self-medicate. Genius!
In June, I sold most of my old vinyl records. I hated to part with them, but I needed the money more than I needed to have them sitting in my house, particularly since I haven't had a turntable in years. The ones I sold were pretty good, and I was a rock star at Newbury Comics in Norwood for a few weeks. I've also got a sizable comic book collection that, thus far, I haven't found a buyer for. Again, there will be some books I'll hate to part with, but they don't help if they just sit. I'll keep some of the graphic novel and trade paperbacks, because I still enjoy reading them. But the comics have to go.
I also used to collect hockey and baseball cards. I have no idea if anything I have is of any value, but those can be sacrificed for the cause as well. I'm not particularly sentimental about any of those, to be honest, so fare thee well, Lefty McWatsisname of the East Podunk Thumbscrews. I hope the space you took up in my house is at least worth some cash. Same goes for you, Bruiser LeKneepad of the Inuit City Mukluks (Okay, that was redundant and gratuitous. But it made me laugh, so get your own damn blog if you don't like it).
Of course, one obvious solution would be to get a new job that pays better, or at the very least a part time job. Trust me, I'm trying that too. You know what I found out, though? Even for part time jobs, they want you to apply online. Really?!? For ringing a register? I suppose they feel cheated out of the opportunity to ignore applicants the way full-time employers do. Yet I keep searching, but the problems I have getting part time work are my full time job schedule, which can change week to week, and the necessity of going to meetings for my recovery, as well as the fact that one of my therapists can only see me during nighttime appointments. So getting a new full time job (or attempting to squeeze more money out of my current employer, which is less likely) becomes my primary solution. I didn't get the job I interviewed for a few weeks back, but I got three calls last week from prospective employers, two of which were unsolicited.
So things are still precarious, financially speaking, but possibly looking up. I haven't yet seriously considered installing a virtual tip jar here, but the thought has crossed my mind. It's starting to get tiresome, this situation, but I've now got some hope. The odds should be in my favor, right? I mean, the universe can throw you only so many curve balls before you start adjusting your swing.
Batter up.
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